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ASI is the Breast
Rachel : What do you mean, you'retaking over my job.
Gavin : Well, while you were on your baby vacation, I was *doing* your job.
Rachel : A vacation? My idea of a vacation does not involve something
sucking on my nipples until they are raw.
Gavin : Clearly you've never been to Sandal's Paradise Island
(Friends/"The One where Rachel Goes Back to Work")
I had never given breastfeeding much thought. I just thought that it's a natural thing to do. I knew that breast milk is the best for babies, that some women produce a lot of breast milk, but others unfortunately don't. In the latter's case, formula will come to the rescue.
When I worked with Post though, I had to cover the issue and met with this famous doctor cum breastfeeding activist. It was, I think, around 2003/4. She was pissed with the aggressive formula marketing, saying that formula is basically bad for babies due to its high level of sugar, etc etc.
She also said that breast milk production is based on demand/supply mechanism. So, basically, there is no such thing as low production of breast milk or even dried up breast milk. Low milk production, she added, has something to do with the stress level of mothers after giving birth; that there is a breastfeeding technique that woman should master to produce sufficient breast milk; that mothers should be patient, and so on.
Breastfeeding campaign has been equally aggressive ever since. The media is filled with PSAs on breastfeeding, and celebrities and socialites alike are assigned to boost the campaign.
I got a whole new perspective about breastfeeding, however, when one of my best friends, Fitri, gave birth to a baby boy a year ago. The baby was healthy but pretty small by today's standard, weighed around 2.5 kilograms. Like many other mothers, Fitri wanted to give breast milk or ASI to her baby. Unfortunately, things did not go well as planned.
First, the struggle to find the most comfortable position for breastfeeding, which included the whole "sucking on your nipples till they're raw". And then the baby blues. But most troubling of all was small milk production, on which Fitri tried really hard to improve it.
She ate all those leaves, herbs and pills that people say can increase breast milk production. Nothing happened. She went to lactation clinic run by the famous doctor. She went to get massages. Still, nothing happened. When she consulted it to the clinic, everybody there scolded her instead, saying that she was not patient enough and did not try hard enough, that she was prone to stress and so on. Other people -- relatives, colleagues, fellow mothers -- were not short of judgment either.
Fitri got really sad, especially because her baby kept on losing weight. I was shocked myself to see the poor baby was so thin. She then asked other mothers what to do as she still wanted to give the baby breast milk. They told her to wait longer cause they also had trouble at first and their babies lost weight. But around a month later, the weight quickly bounced back and went up as breast milk flow more.
But since Fitri's baby was already underweight, she felt that she couldn't wait any longer and finally gave in and turned to formula. And man, did people blasted as if she did not care about her baby.
I think the whole breastfeeding campaign has become unfair and too extreme, not to mention misleading. I believe that Fitri's case is not an exception. And I believe many women really opt for breast milk as formula is so expensive. Instead of putting the blame on women, accusing them of not loving their own babies, it should be acknowledged that some women just don't produce much milk, whatever the reason is, and there should be a good solution for them. And they shouldn't be judged for giving formula.
Some say that all mothers in the old days never use formula. That formula is just another modern day practicality, or vanity. But as far as I know, people in villages feed their babies air tajin or rice water, as a substitute for breast milk.
I'm also disturbed by the fact the women picked as the icons for breastfeeding campaign are celebrities and socialites, who of course have all the resources they need to breastfeed their babies. My sisterin law works as a teller in a state-owned bank, and she can't even get a 10-minute spare time to pump her breast milk. Every time she excused herself to do so, her supervisor would knock the door and asked her to go back to work, which really stressed her out and at the end reduced her breast milk.
I'm thinking of those factory workers who have to work 12 hours straight, and dozens of other working mothers who are struggling to breastfeed their babies even though there is no problem in terms of milk production. With the additional issue of very few daycare facility available (if any at all), I'm worried it would lead to domestication (or is it domestification?) and many women would give up their career. I hope not.
People should just give mothers some slack. | Permalinks
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within this site are copyrighted
2007 © Hera Diani all rights reserved
Website design by loucee | illustration by Lambok Elvandri
in any case, mothers are doomed if they don't breastfeed, and they're doomed if they do breastfeed. Being a woman is a lose-lose proposition in this patriarchal world. People should quit blaming the women. It's the world that revolves too much around male standard.
This includes the concept of domestication, which is very much based on male-dominating biased. In an ideal world, there is no such thing as domestication because women and children would dominate occupy the public sphere including the business and commercial world. The rules and standards which runs the world would go according to the women and children's standard.
I don't know how "correct" this comment is, but this is just a quick thought of mine, without much research to back it up. Just a wishful thinking from a domesticated housewife.
Posted by
Rani |
May 02, 2008 2:42 PM
In any case, stop blaming on anything that we don't know and put every issue at the right proportion.
Well written, her!
Posted by
mellyana |
May 02, 2008 3:27 PM
Thank you for writing about this issue. At least people should really think out of the box instead giving judgments and harsh comments to all mothers who are not lucky enough breastfeeding their children. Becaaauuse.., unable to give something natural and the best from our body, is stressfull enough. Yes, I totally agree, put the issue at the right proportion. As for me, I am dying to breastfeed my daughter exclusively if only I had the privilege to do so...
Posted by
inka |
May 03, 2008 11:43 AM
Rani: For all it's worth, I really admire you for bringing up two boys all on your own. It's a very demanding job (oh yeah, it's an occupation, people) that I myself don't dare to do it yet.
When I was younger, I pictured the concept of 'having it all' (career vs family) for women and thought it was a very feasible thing to do in these days and age. As it turns out, it's actually a myth.
Melly and Inka: Thanks. Again, people should just stop blaming women.
Posted by
hera |
May 03, 2008 10:25 PM
women should not be blamed, because we are the ones with all the suffering and aches (heart and body). What we should blame is the companies that produces baby formulas because it is true, formula is bad for babies just like milk for human. cow's milk were not intended for human, sure it tastes good, but it's not good for our body. and to give that to a baby (not only high in sugar, formulas normally have - if im not mistaken - cow's milk as its main ingredient, which is made of casein/milk protein that cannot be broken down easily in our stomach, therefore creating all sorts of problems)
the food industry, scientists, doctors should work together and create a milk/formula substitute safe for babies. some mothers have plenty of milk and some mothers dont, it doesnt make the latter bad mothers because shit happens (I know someone who thinks moms who doesnt breast feed her child for at least 15 month, mothers who gave birth ceaserian are not real women. wanted to bitchslap her silly but finally able to restrained myself from doing so)..
good writing, we should all echo the words "stop blaming mothers, stop blaming women" We are blamed for too many things already, it's about time they stop and blame someone else instead.
Posted by
rimafauzi |
May 03, 2008 11:35 PM
So, basically, there is no such thing as low production of breast milk or even dried up breast milk
This is so unfair! My mother didn't breast-feed any of us because of a physical deformity which prevented her from breast-feeding. How short-sighted. These poor mothers, I think it's more difficult now than then.
I do get disgusted at overzealous mothers who are so self-righteous and judgmental. That is not restricted to just breast-feeding and the trend seems to be growing! Just to show that they are loving mothers and dedicated wives *eww*
Great writing btw. It evokes such strong emotion from me, hee...hee...
Posted by
Venny |
May 15, 2008 1:28 AM
Thanks, ven.
Strong emotion as in... having a baby? :P Watch out for those motherhood evangelists!! Hahaha.
Posted by
hera |
May 15, 2008 3:49 PM
Good writting, Mbak Hera.... Salam kenal ya. Sorry, I posted in Indonesian.
Terkadang, keinginan untuk memberikan ASI menggebu. Istri-ku begitu, begitu semangat untuk memberikan ASI... tapi apa daya, ternyata memang Istri-ku memang tiak bisa produksi ASI yang banyak (hanya dua minggu, itupun pas-pasan). dari riwayat keluarga, ternyata memang keluarganya mempunyai kecenderungan seperti itu (ASI Sedikit). ISTRI-ku sampai rela mempersiapkan diri dengan baca brosur IMD, dan mempraktekan pada anakku yang kedua. IMD sukses, tapi ASIX gagal.
But, its fine. Even without ASIX..., my 2nd son has grew up better than my neigbhour who gave ASIX to hers. My 1st also without ASIX, but he already famous among our neighbourhood that he is a smart and independent boy.
Yang terpenting adalah keinginan si Orang Tua (Ayah dan Ibunya) untuk memberikan yang terbaik bagi anaknya. Be the best parents to be a parent of the best kids.
Posted by
R. E. Saputra |
July 25, 2008 9:33 AM
Salam kenal juga, Mas Eko. Saya sepakat, ASI memang baik, tapi bukan segalanya. Keponakan2 saya juga diberi ASI hanya 2 bulan, tapi mereka tumbuh cerdas dan sehat, dan kemampuan sosial mereka juga baik.
Yang lebih disayangkan lagi adalah isu ASI ini akhirnya (lagi-lagi) jadi semacam hukuman untuk para ibu.
Posted by
hera |
July 25, 2008 10:25 AM
Ah Hera, dikau membuatku semakin bersemangat saja dan semakin pd wakau gak bisa kasih asi ekslusif :p
Posted by
inka |
August 01, 2008 3:43 PM
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