Namaskar: A love letter to yoga

Photo courtesy of The Jakarta Post.

I lay down on the yoga mat on the floor, panting and sweating profusely. An hour earlier, I thought I would faint, or -- in my most drama queen mode - out of breath, fall flat and die, following a series of rigorous yoga poses.

The suspicion that I cannot make it through one yoga class often emerged, being a non-athletic, non-flexible, asthmatic couch potato. Fortunately, not once that the suspicion has ever been close to come true.

It has been a year since I took up yoga class regularly, which is the longest period I have ever voluntarily committed myself to a form of exercise.
I had tried yoga a couple of times about four years ago on reporting assignments, and I liked it. Mostly because it does not require running or jumping, but still you feel like you burn a lot of calories because it makes you sweat a lot. However, finding a good and affordable yoga studio that can match my schedule as reporter was not easy. So, after a while, I then became my old sedentary self.

A little over a year ago, I found out that two of my friends have given up their well-paying journalism job to be full-time yoga teachers. It was really intriguing, and not to mention the perfect timing as I had grown ridiculously out of shape and sickly. I immediately signed up for one of their classes.

It was Vinyasa, which is a more dynamic kind of yoga. I thought the flow of movements was really graceful and beautiful. That time, I was re-reminded of how stiff my body was. I have a good motoric coordination, but when I bent over, I could not even touch the tip of my toes. Regardless, I really had fun and feel so refreshed.

The next day, however, my body got really, really sore. For two days, I was also sweating buckets, which was new as I didn't sweat easily. My friend, or my teacher, said that after being sedentary for so long, apparently, my metabolism was getting the kick it needed.
After the sore had gone, I came back to class the next week, and the week after, and got really drawn into it. It just makes me feel really fresh and energized. The teachers (Hi Devi dan Sisi :)) are also very supportive and gentle. I was then introduced to several forms of yoga other than Vinyasa: Ashtanga, Yin Yoga and Iyengar, all of which I enjoy. But somehow I find the more dynamic flow of yoga suits me the best.

Slowly but surely, like the methodical principles of the discipline itself, I began to feel the benefits of doing yoga. First of all, I get more flexible and stronger. I can finally touch my toes; the sole of my feet can be flat on the ground while doing the downward facing dog; I can do push up (not 100 times, though), and I can fold my feet and pull myself off the floor, like a scale.

I don't get thinner for doing yoga, as much as I want it to, but I love how it makes my body more toned. I have a better posture, no longer hunching, which started when puberty hit and I felt uncomfortable with my relatively big boobs (speaking of which, yoga amazingly can defy gravity. Awesome). I feel more energized and healthy, and no longer have to deal with menstrual sickness.

But I think the most important progress is how my perception toward my body changes. I have been struggling with my weight since I was a teenager. While I'm not obese, I have always been overweight. During high school, it was especially difficult as you know how teenagers can be so mean and I was the butt of the joke daily for being fat.
Genetically, nobody in my family is thin and we tend to gain weight easily, which is something that can be fought with a lot of exercise and diet, but I just don't have will power or vanity for it. I had been taking my body for granted by not eating well, and was in and out of exercise.

But since I do yoga, I become more aware of my whole body, even the smallest part of it, and appreciate it more. This is the first time in my life that I do exercise not merely because I want to be thin, but because I want to be fit. For the first time in my whole life, I don't hate my body that much.

Sure, it still hurts when some friends asked, "Are you still doing yoga?" and when I said yes, they looked at me from head to toe as if saying "how come you're not thin yet?". But I've learned to shake it off. I no longer get frustrated and throws the efforts all away and goes back to overeating and being couch potato.

There was also a time when I had a really high expectation on yoga and perceived it as the panacea for everything. I later learned that you still need good nutrition and enough rest to stay well. Self-destructive behavior - skipping meal, staying out late, drinking - will cause health problem no matter how many yoga classes you attend a week. I also learned that while yoga can solve my period problem, I have to find another way to overcome mood swing.

I may still have many kilos to shed, and it will probably take five years for me to master Ashtanga series I, if at all. But hey, man, at least I can pull myself together. Literally.

Posted by hera at Friday, January 30, 2009 7:51 PM | Permalinks