Check this out: According to the survey conducted by US-base election advisor organization IFES, a vast majority of Indonesians are content with their family's quality of life, and are optimistic for better future.
The survey show that 81 percent of Indonesians asses their family's quality of life as good/very good, and that even include the socio-economic level E, or the lowest.
This month, either TIME or Newsweek, revealed the happiness level of Asians and, surprise surprise, Indonesians are among the happiest people in Asia.

So, what do those say about us? Maybe it has something to do with the "mangan ora mangan asal ngumpul" philosophy or people's favorite phrase started with "Untung" ("Untung masih hidup... masih bisa makaan...etc.").
Maybe it has something to do with the religious teachings of always be grateful to God no matter how shitty your life is.

To put it in a bitchier way, yes, we are happy people. Happy to steal people's money, happy to be the most corrupted country in Asia, happy to be in the bottom of human development index...happy in gluttony and greed and shopping frenzy despite millions of poor people out there.

Posted by hera at 7:00 PM | Permalinks | Comments   

"Name a movie character you love most you feel like wanting
to marry her/him.."
"Hmmm...William Wallace of Braveheart,"
"He's short"
"I don't care, I love him. Who's yours anyway?"
"Jerry Maguire. 'I love him, Laurel. I love him. I love
him for the man he wants to be, I love him for the man he almost
is, I love him... I love him'"
"Jerry's good. Mine is Dana Scully. I adore her very much. I like
it when a woman is independent and smart and..good looking, of
course. What about you, man?"
"I don't know. Let me think..."
"Come on..."
"I know! It's Gabrielle of Xena! She's cute, she's strong.."
"Ugh. I think she and Xena are lesbian partner"
"No, people got it wrong. It's just that their relationship is so
deep. It's beyond love, higher than love. They're not lesbian,
they're just soulmate."
"Really? Wow, you make it sounds beautiful. But I still think
they're lesbian, though."
"Whatever. Hey, you're quiet. Who's your favorite movie
character?"
"I don't know. I've never given it a thought"
"Oh, come on..."
"I don't know guys, I don't know..."
"Relax.. It's not like cheating or backstabbing your boyfriend.
It's just a small talk, nothing serious here..."
"Yeah, come on. Or you're afraid that we're gonna tell your
boyfriend or something? We won't, girl...we won't.."
"My boyfriend? Yeah, right. I'm not even sure he's the one that
I'm going to marry with."
"What? All these years and you're still not sure? Why you chose
to eat on zinc plate while you can eat on ceramic one?"
"Yeah, like Dorothy in Jerry Maguire said, 'I deserve it'. You
deserve the best!"
"I don't know... I don't know. Just drop it okay?"

***

"Hey. What if you meet a guy. He's smart, he's good looking, he's
sweet, polite, gentle, patient,...all qualities you think a man
should have, he got it,"
"Yeah, so?"
"So, he's a vocalist of this cheesy Malay rock band. Would you
date him?"
"What? Hahaha.. Well, it's tough. Errr.... don't think so,"
"Why?"
"Well, I know I shouldn't be judgmental. And I know sometimes
opposites do attract. But you said it, he's..corny.."
”Now, what if he's smart, good looking, patient...,"
"Okay, okay, I got it. What is his flaw now?"
"He's really obsessed with Mariah Carey,"
"That bitch? Paaa..ss. Hahaha.."
"But he's a great guy!"
"We'll see, we'll see. But Mariah, ugh.."
"Now, what if..."
"Oh, stop it, will you?"

***
Welcome.
No unread messages.

***

"What do you want to know? Career? Family? Love life?"
"The latter, of course,"
"OK. Here. Shuffle the cards,"
"Got it. What? Shuffle them again? Oh, OK,"
"Let's see. Hmm.. Aphrodite. OK... And these wands, and swords.
Oops. Gosh... What the..?"
"Hey, what's going on? Tell me! What would happen to me?"
"Well...I don't know how I should tell you.. Or whether I should
tell you at all. Mmm..I see someone at your office. But you can't
be together because... you know what I'm talking about, aren't you?"
"I.. guess so..,"
"And then I see other person. Still connected with your office
too. But...,"
"Now what?"
"I don't know. This whole love thing is so complicated. I see
conflicts, I see danger. But I just can't explain it because..you
see this card? Suddenly it jumps into other card. It just doesn't
make sense,"
"That means there are some things that she's not supposed to
see,"
"What? Oh no.. Is my love life going to be that doomed?"
"Honey, it's just a fortune-telling.."
"But every time I got my fortune told, it's always been like that.."
"Come on.. you're too smart to believe something like that."

***

"I can't. We can't be together,"
"But why? I love you,"
"I love you too! But as a brother.., you're like my brother to me!"
"I can be your brother, lover, father.. anything you want me to be,"
"It'll be incest!"
"What?? How? I mean..,"
"I'm sorry. I just can't, OK? I can't!... And I don't think we should
see each other anymore."


***
Welcome.
No unread messages.

***

"Remember Four Weddings and A Funeral?"
"Yeah, what about it?"
"Remember the scene, when a man said to Hugh Grant that he doesn't need something spectacular when it comes to finding partner? No need the love at first sight with thunderbolt and all..Do you remember?"
"Yes, that one was after the funeral right? What are you trying to say?"
"That goes for me too. I don't ask for too much. I don't believe
in love at first sight.. Just be friends, and then get along,
settle down.."
"That's too much too, girl.."
"Is it?"
"I come to think it is. We always say that we don't expect too
much. But we want our prince charming, we want our soulmate...and
suddenly, we have this high expectation, the cinderella complex
thing.."
"(sigh).."
"I say, let's just not expecting too much. I just find that life
is less complicated and more beautiful when I don't put it into
so much expectation,"
"Lower our expectation, huh?"
"Exactly,"
"But not pessimistic.."
"Indeed,"
"Hmmm... Can I ask you a question?"
"Why, of course"
"About this whole soulmate thing..."
"Yeah?"
"What if the man is good looking, nice, witty and all.."
"Oh, cut the crap! Don't start!"
"No, no, no, no, listen.. listen.."
"Man.. So, what is he now? A dangdut singer? A cheesy soap opera
actor? A porn star? Hmm.. porn star is good. Oh, God, look what
you've done to me!"
"(laughs) No. He's perfect, perfect. He's just got.. (pause)
small dick! Hahahahahaha..."
"For God's sake! You got a mind like a sewer! Hahaha.."

Posted by hera at 7:03 PM | Permalinks | Comments   

They say people change. I have another theory: People don’t change. They're just revealing their true selves. Nothing changes, really. It's a matter of having the courage to let go off the veils. Finally, people have the nerve to show what they are really made of, what they are capable of doing.

People stretch, bend, twist. But they don’t change in the true sense of the word.

Take my father. All he does is bouncing from one point to another. Each point is as extreme but none of them are pleasant, leaving us with no choice to make.

But when it comes to family, who dares to make choices? You cannot choose your family, they say again. And the list goes on with you can’t choose your neighbors, bosses, colleagues, which implies that life is not about making choices at all.

I sometimes wish, however, that somebody would withdraw the rule so that we can pick at least one family member. That way, I figure, mine would be less screwed up.

But thinking of it makes me chuckle. Because at the same time, perhaps, my family wish for the same thing against me.

Posted by hera at 6:55 PM | Permalinks | Comments   

The one task I still find tough is doing interview. I love writing profile cause I got to meet lots of interesting people. But I hate the interview process.
I'm a bit shy with strangers (hey, I do!). I don't talk with other passengers in buses, trains, or taxi driver. I'm usually quiet on my first encounter with strangers. I guess, like Chandler, I don't make first good impression either. And boy do I suck in job interview!

Other thing is, I'm a pretty private person myself so I understand if people don't wanna open up. So, sometimes I don't make effort to dig deeper which is BIG mistake.
The first years of having to interview people were total hell. I would be really nervous, mumbling incoherently, asking two questions in a row that my interviewee only got and answered the second one. Once I had to ask a shop owner in Glodok and like a fool, I greeted him "Permisi mas eh mbak eh pak..". And he was, like, "Yang bener yang mana nih?" and smirked nastily.

However, it gets better with time and frequency, thank God! And instead of being nervous when I faced difficult interviewee, I now got mad:) Like with that aloof and rude bastard, that Korean DJ from Linkin Park, aargh!
But still, I'm not fond of doing interview. Is there any other way of doing it? I guess not.

Posted by hera at 9:30 AM | Permalinks | Comments   

Back in college days, when I was still a pious Muslim and prayed five times a day, a Catholic friend jokingly said "You're loud when it comes to women's issue. But you're practicing a religion which doesn't even allow women to stand in the same line with men in prayer service, let alone lead the service (become imam)."
Women cannot lead a congregation either in Catholic, so we just laughed it off.
However, that comment stayed in the back of my head, and later on added into the list of reasons why I become agnostic.
I no longer do any religious ritual, but the news on womam imam leading a mixed-gender prayer service in New York last week was very enlightening. Had Amina Wadud done it earlier, perhaps I would have stayed Muslim:)
To all the conservatives and hardliners out there, may God open your mind and heart.

Posted by hera at 10:32 AM | Permalinks | Comments   

That's the Indonesian phrase for eating your own words.
Which is exactly what I'm doing now by having this blog:)
I used to be turned off so much by the nature of personal
blogs: Full of self-important drivel and vanity. Some are
well-written and amusing, but most of them are just..yaawn.
As a journalist, I'm fortunate to have the medium where I can
write virtually anything I want and have people reading them.
However, after being recently moved to national desk from
Sunday desk, I can hardly do that anymore. I can, though, but
I don't have that much energy.
So, here I am:) My husband's already teased me for 'going with
the mass'. Yeah, well...

Btw, thanks a lot Enda, Bapak Blog Indonesia for assisting me,
the virgin blogger. Cheers, man!

Posted by hera at 10:03 AM | Permalinks | Comments